Growing up in a sports family/environment, I always considered myself fit or in shape. I was a skinny kid that would eat anything and everything whenever I wanted and not even gain a pound. Although athletic, I was never a considered myself to have a muscle. Had abs but that was due to the fact of being really skinny, most skinny people have abs.
Coming out of high school, I was at what I considered my athletic peak. I was 5'6, weighing 135 lbs. In the first few months in university, I couldn't even fit the same pants that I brought from home, and this was in October/November-ish. Meaning, in a month or two I gain enough weight that new pants were in order. For me, "freshman 15" hit hard and fast. I wasn't playing sports everyday, and my diet went from bad to worst. No more home cooked meals for this guy. Well some, but it was a lot of cafeteria and late night fast food. I would play intramural once or twice a week and pick up sports even less. Came home after first year around 150lbs. During my university career, my weight went as high as 165 lbs but held around 155-160 lbs.
After university, once I became a grown up (even though Teo believes I am not one haha), I lot of my time, like everyone, is dedicated to work. Working in the hospitality industry, the hours are unpredictable. Meaning, bad sleep patterns, bad meal schedule, just overall bad for your body. I ended weighing up to 165lbs, that was the last of my athletic build.
This is probably the turning point for me. This is when I started to become self conscious of my body and how I looked. For those who know me you're probably thinking of crazy. I'm still a small frame, not considered obese by any means, but to me, it's not what I was used to. One thing someone said to me that I've always remember was them asking "how can you play basketball, you have a big.. (belly)" and proceeded to make a big belly motion with his hands. This shocked me. I didn't think it was a joke at the time. Still don't. Maybe I'm overreacting. It just hit a sensitive spot with me.
Fast forward a few years later. I have a different job, steady hours, steady breaks and meal times, regular workout routine, and I'm able to consistently play some sort of sport once a week. Because of this I dropped 12 lbs within the first 6 months or so. having home cooked meals helped. And working out regularly helped too. I started to feel good about myself. Better about how I looked. Starting to feel more comfortable. Then of course I heard, "you workout? you don't look like you workout." This is another quote that has stuck in my head. I started to question if what I was doing was enough. Why don't I look like I work out? Am I like one of those fitness trainers that people question if they are even fit? From here, I wanted to work harder looking like I work out.
Currently I workout 4-5 times a week. Mostly weights. Basketball once a week, league or pick up, now volleyball twice a month, and the odd workout video session with the wifey. Shift work does take a toll on your body and mind and every now and then I need an extra little push, extra motivation to get me to the gym. I've come a long way since I started working out. I see it as a marathon and not a sprint. The best thing I could of heard was when a co-worker, who is a pretty big guy, said that he's been working out for nearly 20 years to get where he's at. Not saying it's I'm going to take that long to get jacked or anything. It was more of a realistic view to working out especially with my situation..
So what keeps me motivated?
First, it's something that I've just been thinking of for a while now, I always want to be able to carry my kids, literally and figuratively, no matter how big they get. I know it sounds silly but I want to be mentally and physically strong enough to be there for my kids. I got lucky at my work to have a job that isn't physically demanding. I know that this could change any day so I'd rather be proactive then reactive in being fit enough to do my job and not come home sore and broken.
The main reason that keeps me motivated, is for me to be happy about how I looked and not be self conscious about it. It seems so easy, for the most part I am. But there are times when I will compare myself to others, which I know I shouldn't do. Growing up an athlete I've always wanted to have an athletic build, and I guess until then, I am motivated to get it.
How do I stay motivated?
I use anything and everything as motivation. Whether it's negative or positive. Could be a saying/comment or a photo or even just talking to someone about fitness gets me amped for a workout.
One positive reinforcement is when I was told that I motivated them to workout. Being someone's motivation made me more motivated. Weird eh.
I also use short term goals to help me such as vacations, special occasions, and events, to give me an extra push. It keep me going because I only have X amount of days to go.
Two saying that I go by and believe in are
"you'll ever regret a workout"
and
"something in better than nothing"
I'm at the point now where I feel like this is it, if I can't get the body that I want now then I won't be able to. I also know it's not going to happen over night. I'm not going to go on some crazy diet or take crazy supplements to get where I want to be in 12 weeks. I have to keep plugging away and keep telling myself if I put in the work, I'll get rewarded. Sometime I don't get impatience but doing it right takes time. One thing that will help is my wife and I signed up for a 10K run next month. That's added motivation.
I'm pretty sure I just rambled on and don't even know if that made sense. I don't like talking about my myself and what I'm insecure about but it actually made me feel better getting it out. Sorry about any spelling or grammatical errors, English was never my strong suit. Feel free to leave a comment assuming people still read my blog. :)
No comments:
Post a Comment